Are you tired of all those sissy "Friendship" poems that always sound good, but never actually come close to reality? Well, here is a series of promises that really speaks to true friendship:
When you are sad - I will help get you drunk and plot revenge against the sorry bastard who made you sad.
When you are blue - I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.
When you smile - I will know you finally got laid.
When you are worried - I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be and to quit whining.
When you are confused - I will use little words.
When you are sick - Stay the hell away from me until you are well again. I don't want whatever you have.
When you fall - I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass- then help you up.
This is my oath . I pledge it till the end. Why? You may ask. Because you are my friend. Remember: A good friend will help you move. A really good friend will
help you move a body.
I'd like to think that this is exactly the kind of friend that I am...
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